The Art of Negotiation for Product Owners: Essential Skills to Master

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6 minute read

One of the most vital skills for a Product Owner is negotiation. Whether you’re a seasoned Product Owner or just starting out, mastering negotiation can be the key to delivering maximum value. It’s a skill that you’ll use constantly — with developers, stakeholders, and leadership within your organization. Let’s dive into how negotiation plays a role in the life of a Product Owner and how you can become a master negotiator.

Why Negotiation Matters for Product Owners

As a Product Owner, your primary responsibility is to deliver value, even if you don’t have direct control over everything that influences it. Your ability to influence decisions hinges on your negotiation skills. You’ll need to navigate difficult conversations, especially when someone higher up in the organization, like the CEO, has a request that might not align with the product’s vision or overall strategy.

  • Negotiating with Developers: You need to balance the demands from stakeholders with the technical realities your developers face.

  • Negotiating with Stakeholders: Stakeholders often have different priorities, and you’ll need to ensure that the product delivers the most value while keeping them happy.

  • Negotiating with Leadership: Sometimes, leadership will have big ideas that might not align with your product strategy. You’ll need to tactfully handle these situations.

Personal Example: Negotiating with Leadership

Let’s say a CEO requests a new feature that doesn’t align with the product roadmap. As a Product Owner, you can’t simply say “no.” Instead, you’ll need to guide them to reconsider their request. By asking probing questions about the expected outcomes and value of the feature, you can often help the CEO realize on their own that it may not be the best decision. This technique allows you to avoid conflict while still protecting the integrity of the product.

Learning from the Experts: “Never Split the Difference”

A fantastic resource for learning negotiation is the book Never Split the Difference by Chris Voss, a former FBI hostage negotiator. Whether negotiating the release of hostages or bedtime with your kids, the principles remain the same. In both scenarios, the goal is to achieve your desired outcome without direct confrontation.

Voss emphasizes that negotiation isn’t just about getting what you want but about understanding the other person’s needs and desires. As a Product Owner, this is crucial. You need to dig into the “why” behind a request to truly understand what stakeholders want to achieve, and then guide them toward the best solution.

Key Takeaways from Chris Voss’ Techniques:

  • Active Listening: Make the other party feel heard and understood.

  • Tactical Empathy: Understand their emotions and show them you’re on their side.

  • Mirroring: Repeat their words to build rapport and encourage them to elaborate.

  • Labeling: Acknowledge their feelings without agreeing to their demands.

  • Calibrated Questions: Use questions that prompt deeper thinking without cornering them into a yes/no answer.

How to Negotiate as a Product Owner

As a Product Owner, you need to build your negotiation skills to manage expectations and deliver value effectively. Here are some techniques you can use:

1. Ask the Right Questions

When someone makes a request, your goal shouldn’t be to immediately decide whether it’s a good or bad idea. Instead, ask questions to understand the value of the request. What are they trying to achieve? What problem are they solving?

For example:

  • “What is the desired outcome of this feature?”

  • “How will this help the end-user?”

  • “What are the potential downsides of implementing this?”

These questions prompt stakeholders to think critically about their request and often lead them to reconsider without you having to directly say “no.”

2. Frame the Decision

If a request doesn’t make sense, frame the decision in a way that allows the requester to reach that conclusion themselves. You want them to say “no” rather than you having to reject the idea outright.

For instance:

  • If a stakeholder pushes for a new feature, guide them through a Lean Business Canvas or other decision-making framework to help them understand the bigger picture.

  • Instead of refusing a request from leadership, show them the data and analysis behind why the feature won’t deliver the value they expect. They may withdraw the request themselves once they see the full context.

3. Practice Tactical Patience

Sometimes, the best response is no response at all — at least initially. Patience can be a powerful negotiation tool. By giving stakeholders time to reflect on their requests, you might find that they reconsider their position without you needing to intervene.

Building Long-Term Negotiation Skills

Negotiation isn’t just about one-off interactions; it’s a skill you’ll use throughout your career. In our Professional Scrum Product Owner classes, we cover essential negotiation techniques. Although we don’t dive deeply into the topic (there’s only so much you can cover in two days!), we provide you with the foundation and resources to continue learning.

Practical Steps for Learning Negotiation:

  • Take a Professional Scrum Product Owner class: Gain the foundational skills you need as a Product Owner, including how to handle difficult conversations.

  • Learn from your experiences: After every negotiation, reflect on what went well and what you could improve.

  • Get a mentor or coach: If you’re struggling to improve your negotiation skills, consider getting help. My team at Naked Agility offers coaching and guidance for Product Owners at all levels.

  • Continue your education: Whether it’s taking additional classes, reading books like Never Split the Difference, or enrolling in online courses like those on MasterClass, continual learning is key.

The Importance of Negotiation in Maximizing Value

At the end of the day, your role as a Product Owner is to maximize the value of the product. This requires balancing competing demands and navigating tricky conversations with grace and tact. Mastering negotiation allows you to:

  • Influence decisions in your favor, even when you don’t have control.

  • Maintain strong relationships with stakeholders, developers, and leadership.

  • Ensure that the product delivers maximum value, avoiding unnecessary features and wasted time.

Personal Experience: Overcoming a Difficult Negotiation

I once worked with a Product Owner who had trouble saying no to stakeholders. This led to feature creep, overwork, and missed deadlines. After working with them on their negotiation skills, they were able to push back tactfully by framing discussions around value and guiding stakeholders to the right decisions. The result? A streamlined product backlog and more focused, high-impact work.


If you’re a Product Owner struggling with negotiation or just getting started, don’t wait. Develop these skills now to avoid being overwhelmed later. My team at Naked Agility can help you find the right training or coach to improve your negotiation skills. Check out the links in the description for more information!

📈💡 Remember: Negotiation is a skill that grows over time. The more you practice, the better you’ll become at delivering maximum value while maintaining strong relationships.

One of the things to teach a product owner apprentice is negotiation. Negotiation is something that, as a product owner, really as any team member, but especially as a product owner, you’re going to be using constantly. You’re going to have to negotiate with the developers on your team, you’re going to have to negotiate with your stakeholders, you’re going to have to negotiate with leadership in your organization. If you, as a product owner, want to be able to influence the things in your organization that affect your ability to deliver value, even if you don’t control them, you need to understand how to negotiate and engage with the people who can.

So, negotiation is really important. As a product owner apprentice, there’s a great book—I’m trying to remember the author—but the title is “Never Split the Difference.” “Never Split the Difference” is about negotiation. It’s written by the FBI’s head hostage negotiator for the last 20 years, and he talks about it as whether you’re negotiating bedtime for your kids or negotiating hostage release; it’s the same tools and techniques that you use. He has a masterclass on masterclass.com.

What you need to consider as a product owner, and if you’re helping out an apprentice product owner, they need to understand the ramifications of the decisions that they’re making and how to engage in communication that gets them to an effective result. Just because a stakeholder wants something, even if they’re the CEO, doesn’t mean it’s a good idea to build it. It just doesn’t mean it’s a good idea to do it. But you might not be able to just say no to that person.

What are the tools and techniques that you build as an individual to help you enable that other person to withdraw the request? That’s the way I think about it. You don’t want to say no; you want them to say no. If so, you might not start with saying no; you might start with asking them questions about what it is they expect to achieve from that thing. When they don’t know the answers, that could be a good indication that it’s not well thought through.

Perhaps you sit with them and do a lean business canvas. What information do they need? For example, the CEO—if you’re an apprentice product owner, you’re not going to be able to say no to the CEO. What do they need to understand themselves so that they say no? That’s what you need to enable as a product owner. You need to enable their understanding so that they realise that that’s not the outcome that they’re trying to achieve.

If you want them to say yes to something, if you’re the product owner asking for more money, or asking for new features, or asking for a different name for your product, or more budget—whatever those things are—you don’t want to start by just asking a question that has a yes or no response. “Will you give me the money for this?” No. You want to figure out how do you get to yes, and it’s not always a straight line. That’s what negotiation is all about.

These are fantastic skills that you need to learn, and we do cover some of them in the Professional Scrum Product Owner class. We don’t dive that deeply, right? I mean, we’ve got a two-day class; you can’t really dive too deeply into some of these topics. But what we do cover is what are the things that you need to understand and where can you find the additional information that you need to engage in longer-term learning about this topic or these stories.

If you’re taking our immersive classes, right, they have a lot more assignments to go and do in your organisation, so you would be able to come back. We can talk about how you engage with people in your organisation and how you improve those techniques over time. That’s the value of negotiation.

As a product owner apprentice, or as somebody who’s getting started as a product owner, or even if you’ve been a product owner for a while and you’re struggling to engage with people and get that influence that you need to maximise value, those are the techniques that you probably want to focus on: negotiation techniques.

If you find it hard to learn negotiation skills, my team at Naked Agility can help you find a product ownership course or coach who can help you, or we can find somebody who can. Don’t let these sorts of issues undermine your ability to deliver value and get help with them as soon as you can. Use the links in the description to get in touch.

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